Saturday Feb 28, 2009

*Nightmares Consume Me

*WARNING: THE FOLLOWING DISCUSSION CONTAINS STRONG LANGUAGE. VIEWER DISCRETION IS ADVISED. *PAPERCUT - LINKIN PARK My nightmares terrorize me constantly. They're so gory and horrific, Wes Craven would vomit at the sight of them. Oh yeah, its that horrible. They're almost always the same. It always starts with me and my friends. Happy times, fun times. Then something goes horribly wrong [fight, argument, wrong thing being said, etc] and I end up dying in a terrible and unimaginably possible death. Occasionally, the terror would just start immediately. I want to escape [wake up] but I can't. It won't let me go! The part that makes me really jump...It's always the same guy who kills me and I know exactly who it is. Weapons he's used? Dozens. Swords, guns, flamethrower, his bare hands, copper wire, machete, knifes, a titanium pipe and dry ice mixed with paint. It scares the living shit outta me. It feels so real and...I just wake up in a cold sweat and cry into my pillow. Its been happening ever since the 12th...when he got locked up. I never ment for that to happen. The detective said he was gon atalk to him, not...arrest him. I swear that's what he told me. Why he got arrested...I can't really say. I quote the dectective saying:

I won't arrest him unless he rolls in here like a badass.
Anywho, back to my sub-conscience. And its not only him in the nightmares. Sometimes, other people would help by hitting me or stabbing me or something. It's really fricken scary. Like you have to envision it in order to see what I'm saying. Like these nightmares are really fucking me up and I want them out of my sub conscience... I'll tell you guys one right now.
I was in California. I was driving when my car collided with a 16 wheeler. My car was totaled but I [miraculously] lived. It was one night in the hospital when 'R' covered my mouth and said "Scream and we'll blow your brains out faster". 'A' then came and took his sword...Damien, I think..and stabbed it cleanly through my chest. I let out a scream and he took out another sword and stabbed it through my throat. That made me choke on a mix of my own vomit and blood.  They both let out smirks and laughs as 'A2' came, took out a sword and stabbed it through my head. I woke up with cold sweat on my face and I need to cry. So I let it out on my pillow and fell back asleep.
Anyone know how to make these stop? XOXO, Graciela *PAPERCUT - LINKIN PARK

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